When you get there
by PerfectionIsntSexy
Summary: Brittany isn't graduating..but Santana is. It'll either make or break the relationship!


"Sometimes I forget how awesome your mom is San." Brittany said in awe after Maribel had kissed the girls goodbye and reminding Santana a billion times that she needed to call her when she got home from Breadstix, the girls had stayed because you know how much Santana loves the place..While there was still food left, Santana would stay.

"Yeah, me too B. I'm glad she came back to see us graduate though." She smiled back the blonde who quickly became very interested in the floor.

"Britt? What's wrong?" Something had to be wrong, she had seen that face before. Right before she turned her down the first time Santana admitted her feelings by the lockers, it couldn't be good.

"I wanted to tell you earlier but..I couldn't."

"Tell me what? Britt seriously." Their hands found each other before they knew what was going on and it made the words harder to say.

Brittany could feel her throat tightening and it felt like she was choking on words she should have said weeks ago, then they could have prepared, they could have talked about it or they could have even stopped it. But Brittany was one to suffer in silence and she really was suffering right now.

"I'm not..I'm not going to graduate." She hoped if she said it quietly, it wouldn't be as real but it didn't work. She tried her best to turn away so she didn't have to see Santana's reaction. She wasn't smart and she knew that, her grades weren't good enough and that hurt, but seeing Santana cry would break her.

Santana could feel cracks open up on her heart and it took everything she had not to let it break. Crying until her face bled would be the best option, and it really was all she wanted to do. They were supposed to leave Lima and they were supposed to go to Louisville but they were supposed to do it together.

"Britt! What the fuck? Why didn't you tell me?" Santana tried her hardest to tape up the cracks in her heart, but for each one she sealed, 5 more appeared and that meant statistics just weren't on her side. She gave up and let the tears fall freely down her face.

"I didn't tell you because I knew you'd react like this!" the blonde tried to defend herself but it was a pretty shitty defence and they both knew it, it wasn't how Santana would have reacted. The only reason she did react like that was because now it was too late to do anything about it.

"I told you I was failing..You knew."

"You didn't tell me you failed though B! You said you were taking care of it? All those nights you were "studying" and refused to let me in, what were you really doing B? The last 4 months you said you've been working your ass off to make sure you got the grades! And..You didn't let me help."

Brittany had locked herself away and spent as little time as she possibly could with Santana to study. That was what hurt, the fact that she _had_ been studying and she _had _been trying her hardest. But it still wasn't enough. Knowing you aren't good enough hurts, but knowing that not even your _best _was good enough was a heart breaker.

"I tried." Her voice was low and barely audible.

"You tried? Well you didn't try hard enough Britt! I would have done your assignments and I would have found a way to cheat on your test if you needed me too!" Santana was the best cheater ever and she could have gotten anybody an A*, she wasn't a bad tutor either and she had gotten all B's to A*'s! So she could have tutored Brittany the real way, but now it was too late.

"Why didn't you tell me Britt?" Her anger had faded a little and then it turned to hurt. Her girlfriend was in trouble and she didn't even know.

Brittany shrugged, "I didn't want you to be disappointed in me."

"I would neve-"

"Everybody else is." She quickly shot back before Santana could comfort her. "Everybody knows how stupid I really am now. I couldn't pass, just one more time and I couldn't do it. You always protect me and tell me I'm smart but I'm not!"

"B, you can retake the test you failed! Puck did it! So just tell me what you failed and I'll handle it." She pleaded with the sad blonde.

"You can't fix it Santana."

"I can damn well try. Now tell me what subject you failed." She demanded and this time they both knew Brittany had to tell her.

"All of them."

That was the final kick to the chest and if Santana thought she was crying before, now there was a god damn flood. Brittany refused to look at her girlfriend as she broke down in the restaurant , thankfully they were in the corner at the back so not too many people witnessed the emotional breakdown.

"Britt," Her mood had changed again and she was happening so fast that it scared her, she had never felt so many emotions in such a short amount of time. "This isn't fair! You're better than every fucker at this stupid shitty school! Figgins is a fucking stupid bastarding asshole!" Santana's rant that made so sense at all could have carried on for hours, there were still plenty of swear words she could have forced into that sentence.

"I know San," It was all she could say because Santana was in no fit state to consider using any words other than offence ones right now. The brunette was still mumbling profanity as she held on tighter to Brittany's hand and so she figured now would be as good a time as any to bring up the next problem.

"So, when you get there-"

"I'm not going anymore." She sulked back like a child would, not at Brittany but at the situation itself. But it didn't affect Brittany's speech.

"When you get there, there's going to be other girls. Girls that are funnier, prettier girls and smarter than me. There's someone out there right for you and she might even be in Louisville. So, I don't want you to pretend you love me when you find her."

"It's you Britt, it's always been you and it always will be! Fuck college, I didn't want to go anyway. I'll be a Lima loser if it means I get to be one with you. I'll get a job at breadstix because we both know how much I love it here." She forced out between tears and it quickly brought Brittany to tears too for the first time all evening.

She had been so strong throughout all of it and kept her cool, but having Santana tell her that she'd throw away her future to be with her was too much and she couldn't help but feel like anybody who was willing to do that _had _to be 'the one.' But Brittany had tried and she had tried really hard but it still wasn't enough. So maybe there was something in Louisville Santana was supposed to find, without her.

They were both crying uncontrollably and they wasn't sure who had made the move but they were holding onto each other like their life depended on it. It gave Brittany a chance to say what had wanted to all night. She pushed her body deeper into Santana's and whispered into her ear.

"Go to college San."

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**Probably a one shot! but If I get enough reviews and what not then I might consider taking it further. But for now, Enjoy the sadness I just gave you! Well ,I hope, since that was the whole point of the story. If not then I'm a pretty shitty writer..anyway! REVIEW.**


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